While i never did an update episode about this i later learned that i should not be using Davis Aurini as a source or perhaps not Matt Forney either due to what went down after this episode was made, based on a quick glance at the show notes most of this episode still seems accurate since it doesn’t really deal with their documentary which i have not seen.

 

Hello and welcome to Aspiebloggen podcast episode 8. I am your host Tommy Eriksson. In todays episode what I think about Jordan Owen and his resent mental breakdown.

This is the podcast where I bring you my views on things, in an attempt to let my voice be heard and to grow my confidence. For too long I have not voiced my opinions on the things that matter to me but that will all change now.

Some of what I will bring up will be about asperger and autism related stuff since that is what my blog is about, but most will be my opinions on things and what is going on in my life. My website is at aspiebloggen.se. There you will find the show notes for each episode as well my other blog posts. The blog itself is in Swedish but this podcast and the corresponding show notes will always be in English.

Now let’s get started.

Todays episode is brought to you by the letter U.

So I was listening to episode 75 of The Matt Forney show and the topic was about Jordan Owen, one of the two people working on a documentary called the Sarkeesian Effect, which is or I should say was about social justice warriors and how they use their professional victimhood for profit. The name comes from Anita Sarkeesian who has been very successful at scamming people with her lies about sexism in video games.

Well the documentary might never happen since Jordan had a breakdown and ditched the project. Why? Well because Davis Aurini who was the other man working on the video is friends with Roosh V, who runs the blog Return Of Kings and Jordan has issues regarding the content of that blog. Most of it seems to concern women and dating and Jordan’s problems in that area and also the subject called game.

Well Jordan feels that using game to coerce women into dating and of course sex is wrong and that it is basically like rape since the women are “tricked” into doing something they don’t really want. My game is non-existent but even I know that that is not what game is. Game is just a way to present yourself in as good way as possible to achieve the goals that when reached will be of benefit to both partners. The fact that many women end up regretting it has nothing to do with it. Regretting something after it has happened doesn’t change the fact that when it happened both parts agreed to it.

I don’t normally talk about dating due to my inexperience on the subject but after hearing his truly disturbing opinions I had to speak up. Like Jordan I’m a fat slob and for the reasons I talked about in the last episode I’m unable to change that. I know that going low carb and to the gym would work miracles on my physic but it is more than I am capable of doing right now.

Jordan thinks that women should flock to you regardless of how you look and that if they don’t then you deserve to die childless and alone and that nothing should ever be done to change womens opinion on you, IE get better looking and such. Well screw you Jordan. Now I would also like women to throw themselves in my arms but I do know how attraction work and realize that I’m not that attractive. Jordans opinion is that a man regardless of BMI should just wait for women to show up and if that doesn’t happen then that is OK. But you should never try to make yourself more attractive and learn how to talk to women, oh no that is creepy. Well I’ve tried the whole waiting thing and it is not working and I don’t expect it to work anytime soon. Fat people are not attractive to me nor most people and the way to fix that is not to change peoples opinions on fat people but to not be fat.

What I can’t understand is why Jordan didn’t follow Davis’ advice. I mean you have incredible support yet that wasn’t good enough for Jordan. The movie Dogma directed by Kevin Smith would have you believe that ideas are better than faith because you can change your ideas. Well while you can also change your faith I don’t think that changing ideas is as easy as that otherwise great movie would have you believe. Just look at the feminist ideologues who rage over the so called manosphere. The incredible hatred that they have over what mostly just amounts to dating advice and how to eat better with some philosophy thrown in for good measure. Why do they hate it so much?

I myself could easily fill my mind with similar hate but I try hard every day not to. For many years I have more or less resented the guys who can get girls by just being present yet now I understand. BTW this would be a good place to mention something that Elliot Rodger said. He wondered why no woman liked him. Thinking about it I wonder the same thing. I get why Jordan Owen and I aren’t getting laid but why not Elliot Rodger. I mean he was good looking and to me he looked a lot like Justing Bieber who we all know are very popular with girls. The only reason I can think of and this has probably been mentioned somewhere but I haven’t read much at about him but he can not have been particularly nice to the people he met. I can’t put it into words but he must have been very bad with people to drive them away despite having looks like that.

Anyways regarding my own views on the popular guys so do I not want to go around and hating them for being so successful. No I don’t want to hate them, I want to be them. Unfortunately not enough to make the necessary changes. Guess how I feel about valentines day. Actually I thought more about it before it happened. When it was going on I might have had some passing thought about it but I didn’t let it ruin my mood. Thinking about it wouldn’t in any way have improved my day to I tried not to. What will bother me however is summer when all girls start wearing very little clothing. Summer is always a tough time for singles such as myself.

If only I was a woman, then I could join the fat acceptance movement and bitch and moan over how no one likes me because I’m fat. If men did it they would be shamed but apparently women are excused for some strange reason. I mean attraction is not a secret. Women want tall, somewhat muscular guys and men want slim, symmetrical looking women with long hair and nice breasts. Fat acceptance is not going to change that

I can’t change how tall I am or the fact that my spine is bent in a hunch but I can change my weight and how not at all muscular I am, if only I had the energy. That is my excuse, what is yours. BTW I started writing this episode several days ago while first listening to Matt’s show but now when I go back to listen to it again it is gone both from the blog and iTunes and Soundcloud. I don’t know why. And of course I deleted the file I downloaded I mean it is 2 hours long so when would I listen to it again. Episode 76 didn’t mention why it’s gone either. Oh well.

The shownotes for this episode will at aspiebloggen.se/8. Until next time, take care.

Hello and welcome to Aspiebloggen podcast episode 7. I am your host Tommy Eriksson. In todays episode it’s all about what it is like to podcast without passion. This is the podcast where I bring you my views on things, in an attempt to let my voice be heard and to grow my confidence. For too long I have not voiced my opinions on the things that matter to me but that will all change now.

Some of what I will bring up will be about asperger and autism related stuff since that is what my blog is about, but most will be my opinions on things and what is going on in my life. My website is at aspiebloggen.se. There you will find the show notes for each episode as well my other blog posts. The blog itself is in Swedish but this podcast and the corresponding show notes will always be in English.

Now let’s get started.

Todays episode is brought to you by the letter M.

So I’ve mentioned David Lewis who runs the podcast called The Audacity to Podcast before and how I find it inspiring. Well I might not have phrased it like that but yeah I like it. So one thing he has talked much about is POD or Passion, organization and dialog and how those are essential for podcasting. Well this episode will be all about what it’s like to podcast without any of that.

I’ve been watching a videoblog called EEVblog on youtube and I’m struck by how passionate the host Dave Jones is. I wish I could be like that but every time I try to read a script it sounds forced and not at all passionate. Well that is because I don’t really have any passion for things anymore. I have mentioned this before in some way but felt like revisiting the subject.

So what is causing my feelings of being down. I can’t find the script when I said it so it must have been in episode one which was not scripted. I just tried listening to it and couldn’t find the part and really didn’t want to listen to the whole episode. Man I sure hope I don’t loose too many listeners due to how crappy that episode is yet I don’t want to remove it and put a rerecording there. I want to show a possible progression of my capabilities as a podcaster.

So what’s going on is that 2 years ago I applied for disability pension. I wont go into the exact reason for it but since then all my days have been about waiting for a positive notice. Well the first instance turned it down so then I appealed it. The appeal was rejected as well. The was in 2013. Last year the case went to an administrative court or Förvaltningsrätten in Swedish. So more waiting for me. Last November it too got rejected. And now finally it is something called an administrative court of appeal or Kammarrätten in Swedish. Now that court is somewhat different. Before I know if it will even take on the case I have to get something called a probationary. At least that is what google translate called it. Anyway that is what I’m currently waiting for. If I get it then I might get an approval or appeal or whatever from the court, or I might not and if I don’t get it then case is closed.

So here I am sitting around waiting for time to pass so I can begin living. Because that is something that i’m not really doing at the moment. Living. Every day is just a way for me to occupy my mind until the day has passed so that a new day can begin and I might get a court appeal in the mail. Needless to say i hate weekends since there is no mail then. Now I have several things that interest me and that I want to get into but it is hard to find the will to do it. I mentioned the EEVblog before and I found it when I searched for Arduino stuff on youtube. I have seen some episode from it before which was about how stupid the idea of solar roadways are. The math in that episode made my head spin, I’m not an engineer, but you don’t have to be to know that solar roadways will never work. Common sense should be enough. Anyways I don’t know which episode that was and I’m current on about 330 and haven’t seen it yet. I don’t watch every episode because so few of them are of any interest to me. While I began thinking about this episode this morning it took to before lunch before I started writing and then I spent lunch watching more episodes than I should have. It is an easy way to pass the time yet more important stuff suffered because of it.

The table should have been built now but for reasons I talked about in last episode it haven’t so there hasn’t been any pressure on me to fix the stuff I need to do. I finally got the wire baskets that I wanted to have in the workshop and built them on Thursday but it took to last evening before I started taking a better look at moving stuff to them. The plan was to put cardboard in the bottom and sides of each basket to stop small things from falling right through. Well it turns out that cardboard aren’t so fond of being bent into shape so it took about 30 minutes to prepare one basket and then I still had 7 more to go. I just didn’t want to do that so after moving small electronic items related to model aviation into it and then put the large stuff from the same banana box into another basket with some other stuff, I didn’t want to do more that day since it was getting late and all so I called it the day.

I must get the workshop in order soon so I can begin building stuff. BTW if all goes according to plan then by Monday I will have the stuff I need to build the table. I sure hope so. So to summarize the skills I will need to get or improve to make the train layout I want. First there is woodworking. Then there is concrete molding and lastly there is circuit design and microchip programming. Concrete molding is the only thing that I have no experience in whatsoever. While an Arduino obviously is more advanced than the Lego Mindstorms RCX I have programmed with before the principle is the same and I did go a one year course in automatic control engineering but that was more focused of troubleshooting than construction so I’m not an engineer. Yet I did get to make things with real industrial equipment and software. I’ve read about woodworking and know at least a little about using tools so with help I will probably get that table up. I have bought three different books about concrete molding for decorative purposes but non of them mentions ferro-cement which is the technic i will use to build the landscape of the model railroad layout. At least online sources has been of help there.

So as you can see i have a lot of things to learn and I know that I can do it, if only I can put enough effort into it. And there is the problem since I don’t know if I can. I want to, I really do but that passion that I once had just isn’t there due to all the waiting around and all would be so much easier if only my pension could be approved. If so then a huge weight would be lifted from my chest and I could focus better on what I have to do. As of right now my focus is all over the place and I tend to start several things and have difficulty finishing them.

A part of me feels like giving up podcasting, at least for a while, but I’ve put so much time into it and now when I’m in iTunes directory I can’t just quit. And if I did I would just be worried about if I could do it hence why I didn’t want to wait more before starting. Yet every Saturday I know that I have to make another episode and that I will spend most of the day coming up with a script and then proofreading it. I didn’t proofread the early scripts but that lead to problems when I was to read and record them because the bad grammar made me stutter so I had more editing to do. Every week a new episode without passion, organization or dialog. Last week I finished the script half past eleven at night and knew that I couldn’t get the episode out before midnight so I waited till Sunday to record it.

Oh well another week another episode and then time will pass and hopefully something positive will happen. The shownotes for this episode will be at aspiebloggen.se/7 and that will be all for now. Until next time take care.

Hello and welcome to Aspiebloggen podcast episode 6. I am your host Tommy Eriksson. In todays episode, updates about twitter, iTunes and my new hobbies.

This is the podcast where I bring you my views on things, in an attempt to let my voice be heard and to grow my confidence. For too long I have not voiced my opinions on the things that matter to me but that will all change now.

Some of what I will bring up will be about asperger and autism related stuff since that is what my blog is about, but most will be my opinions on things and what is going on in my life. My website is at aspiebloggen.se. There you will find the shownotes for each episode as well my other blog posts. The blog itself is in Swedish but this podcast and the corresponding show notes will always be in English.

Now let’s get started.

Todays episode is brought to you by the letter Å.

So another week has passed and it’s time to make a podcast. Last episode was special since it was prerecorded on last Wednesday since I was at a party last weekend. My niece turned 21. The only part I was really worried about was how I would create a short link using prettylink when the page linked to didn’t exist when the link was made. Thankfully it still worked even though the title ended up being page not found for a few days until I could fix it.

Another thing that happened about the time that I recorded the episode was that I applied for and got accepted into iTunes. I was going to say something about welcome all new listeners but if I read the stats right then there are non except for the iTunes team. But just in case I got it wrong, Welcome all new listeners to my podcast. Please leave a comment or review so I can get some feedback. Either way at least now I can add the iTunes subscriptions URL to the blog so that people can find the show that way. BTW I only found the podcast through the link I got when I got accepted, I can’t find it while searching. Weird but hopefully that will change soon.

So about twitter. I know that it has only been a few weeks since I said that it might take months before I return and I still stand by that, but I still wanted to share what I feel about my twitter absence so far. Yes I do not regret giving up twitter. Just as with World Of Warcraft giving it up seemed hard but after I did it I found it to be easier than I had thought. I might still return to Twitter but so far I’m not missing it. It’s nice to not have to go through last nights tweets every morning. Since I am in Sweden and most of those I follow is in America I have a lot of tweets to read in what is morning here but might be night or at least afternoon in America. Timezones and all that.

And so the big reveal about what I have been doing for these past weeks that has taken so much time. That would be some new hobbies I plan to get into or in one case has.

When I was young my dad owned a model railroad. I wasn’t allowed to use it much and even after his passing I was afraid to harm it since it was fragile at least as far as derailing and crashing was concerned. After a while I lost interest in it and when we moved to a smaller house where there would be no room to build it, it ended up in boxes. While I might have had some wish to rebuild it, I don’t really remember, there was also that issue of building stuff for it. Gluing things is not for me, something that got very clear to me the 2 times I tried to get into Warhammer 40K. Yes twice with about a year apart and both times costing me lots of money that I didn’t fully recover even after selling most of the stuff. Oh well.

Even today the thought of having to glue buildings didn’t appeal to me and of course the trains aren’t exactly cheap either. But for a long time I did want to get back to model railroading. There was another material though that I had heard about and seen the trains from for over a decade, Lego. Lego also have trains, in fact those go back to the late sixties. Nowhere near as old as model railroading that is about a century older but still nothing new.

And Lego offered another advantage. Buildings are easier to build since it’s you know Lego. This also means that they are far more durable and also easier to repair, not that I know when that would be a factor. Of course only Lego trains need to be built while the other trains come prebuilt but I don’t consider that a disadvantage. I remember being nearly paranoid over the possibility of my model trains derailing but with Lego I know of people who deliberately try to derail their trains. Something that is very possible and that I myself have done. As long as all parts of the trains stay on the table then there are no worries really. Granted if your layout has lots of things standing near the tracks then those might get damaged or at least tip over but other than that not much will happen. And even if the train was to leave the table, depending on the floor the train might do more to the floor than what the floor does to the train.

Now I got a small starter set nearly 2 years ago and only now have I felt like putting in the effort to get a separate table for it. Unfortunately that hasn’t gone to well. Due to a broken down car in one case and some illness in another, the people who would have helped me get the materials home to make the table have not been able to help me so nothing has been built. Hopefully that will change soon. I have thought so much of what I will build and how and now I feel that the only way forward is by measuring the real deal. I can’t make anything more in the cad programs that exist to help with designing layouts since some terrain features will determine how the tracks will go.

Needless to say but those who prefer clean looking layouts will probably be horrified by what I have planned. I have several things I really want to have on my layout and few if any of them will mix well with Lego trains. The rail is a mix of the old blue rail from the late sixties to the early seventies and the newer power functions rail from a few years ago.

As far as making the train itself, I have spent countless hours pouring over how other model railroaders have constructed their tables. Those tables might be made for a different scale but I trust in them to know how train tables should be built. But as I said all plans for now are all in my head since I can’t start building right now.

Remember how I said that I was going into new hobbies. Well the other hobby I’m eventually getting into is concrete molding for decorative purposes. This isn’t random but because of the train layout I will build. When I started to think about what to put on the layout I remembered a book I read over 20 year ago about water wheels in gardens. These wasn’t for power generation, no it was just for fun. I don’t know the name of the book which is a shame because I would love to read it again. Anyway the momentum of the spinning wheel was transferred using wooden gears but try as I might I can’t remember clearly how it was eventually used.

But thinking of this I decided to add a water wheel to my train layout. Now I like things to move so the wheel would be moved by real water, not just look like it could. My first plan was to make a lake area where the water would stream with help of a pump from a mountain made from something into a chute that would move the water over the wheel.

After trying to find ways to waterproof papier mache, which was the material I first planned to use, I heard about a material called ferrocement. This as the name suggests is partly made from concrete. It is actually concrete smeared over a wire-frame mesh made from chicken wire for smaller things to a combination of chicken wire and rebar for bigger projects such as tables or benches. Ferrocement has 2 distinct advantages compared to papier mache. First it is not only waterproof, no it can almost be called eternal. Papier mache can be waterproofed, with boat varnish apparently being the preferred choice but it is still nowhere near as strong as concrete. Also, varnish is not cheap. The second reason I chose concrete is that it already looks like mountains for obvious reasons.

But before I go more into that I have a table to build. Good thing since the waterwheel is giving me a headache as far as planning goes. Just trying to figure out where the water will go after it leaves the wheel takes much time to figure out. My first plan was to have a lake area where the water would drain below the table in a pipe down to a reservoir. But that would require some expert concrete molding and the only molding I’m good at is cupcakes. The next plan was to build what model railroaders call a helix. That is a round screw-like area where trains will travel from a lower level to a higher one. Think of a hill only round. I thought that since the outer edges of a circular track of Lego rail will be 72 centimeters in diameter then I could make the helix hollow and put the wheel in there. That way the helix would contain all the water. Also, I found out that the most common pumps like to be submerged and don’t pump more than about 50 cm high so the reservoir would have to be close to the wheel. The problem now is that I don’t know how to transfer the mechanical power from the wheel out from the helix so I might have to change that plan as well. I have some ideas but more planning will be needed before I talk about that.

So that is what I have been doing for the past well I guess month now and will continue with until I have something I like. But that will be all for now. Thank you to whoever might be listening for doing that and please leave a comment on my blog over at aspiebloggen.se or make a review on iTunes. The shownotes for this episode will be over at aspiebloggen.se/6 and until next time, take care.

Hello and welcome to Aspiebloggen podcast episode 5. I am your host Tommy Eriksson. In todays episode I finally talk about aspergers syndrome and autism.

This is the podcast where I bring you my views on things, in an attempt to let my voice be heard and to grow my confidence. For too long I have not voiced my opinions on the things that matter to me but will all change now.

Some of what I will bring up will be about asperger and autism related stuff since that is what my blog is about, but most will be my opinions on things and what is going on in my life. My website is at aspiebloggen.se. There you will find the shownotes for each episode as well my other blog posts. The blog itself is in swedish but this podcast and the corresponding shownotes will always be in english.

Now let’s get started.

Todays episode is brought to you by the letter Ö.

On my aspergers page I have a quote from me saying that aspergers is like a computer that someone has ripped out all the cables from and then put them back in, it works just not the same. That, well is not the best thing I have ever written, but at the moment I think I will leave it in there.

Unlike some people like Mike Cernowich I don’t believe in changing my previous blogposts to reflect new opinions unless I wrote something that was way out of line. No I would rather just make a new post or now adays a podcast about how my opinions have changed. That is why I don’t necessarily agree with everything on this site and some things like the page about love shyness makes me embarrassed, but I would like this blog to show how I have changed through the years and I can’t do that if I delete old content or change it to reflect my current views. I think I said in the very first episode that a part of this podcast will be about older blogposts and what I feel about them today. Maybe I really don’t like it anymore or more likely I still do. Still, the blog celebrated its 8th birthday this year so there is plenty of material.

Due to laziness I tend to write the script about an hour or so before recording, yet if I where to actually talk about what I have written before I will obviously have to read what I have written before and that would take a long time and remind me of a lot of things that I would rather forget so it might take awhile before I find the courage to do so.

So what is asperger. Some call it a disorder but I’m not so fond of that description. Others call it a disability or handicap but aspies like myself argue that from our perspective others are the handicapped ones. I mean sure our social interaction skills are different but can they truly be called a disability. That’s just a point of reference. Granted while how I chose to socialize or not fits better with the term introverted, something that not all aspies are. Yes unlike the pop-culture version you can have aspergers and still be extroverted.

Still, I do have some actual disabilities and they are all tied to my senses. All my senses are on high alert all the time. My vision is sensitive to light so while outdoors on sunny days I wear sunglasses. My nose is sensitive enough that I really don’t like being near smokers or people using lots of perfume. Interestingly those people tend to overlap. I remember back in school when the girls who smoked used to try to conceal the smell of smoke by using lots of perfume and deodorants. Everyone with a working sense of smell, IE non-smokers immediately recognized the futility of that endeavor. Oh well. And don’t even get me started on how public restrooms can smell.

My sense of touch is really sensitive as well. Slight pun intended. I hate having syringes stick a hole in me and are glad that it is a rare occurrence. One thing I haven’t talked about is that I have a swollen leg that has been bothering me for over a year now. I wear compression socks as a way to deal with it, not that they have helped. Well my point for bringing this up is that I was finally at a checkup by doctor that seemed to know what he was doing and while there will be another visit to another doctor for final diagnosis, he told me that one part of the examination will be about putting a blood pressure cuff over the leg. I just know how much tend to hurt my arm and my arms are nowhere near as sensitive as my leg. I hope that doesn’t actually happen.

And finally hearing. This is by far my biggest handicap. I can control how I see the sun, I can make sure to avoid public restrooms and not get injections, have my blood tested are check my blood pressure, but I’m always bothered by sounds I don’t want to hear. 2 things I really hate are dogs and kids. Dog are always barking as long as another one of their kind is within a kilometers range and happen to be barking for some reason and most kids just can’t shut-up but have to shout everything they say. As far as pets go I prefer cats, they are cute and unless they get into a fight also quiet, and did I mention cute. The cat owners in the world can relax though, I don’t have any plans to join you. Anyone who knows how I manage my flowers knows why. I’m content to just look at cats.

Back to noise. I really hate living in an apartment and would move if I could. Unfortunately that is not possible to here I am. I could settle for living in a rented apartment again and not a house as long as it is not next to something else, but I guess that still makes it a house. Either way my economy doesn’t allow moving so I’m stuck.

What troubles me is my inability to block sounds I don’t want to hear. From my previous description it might sound that I wear earplugs all day, this is only true on new year eve since I hate the sounds of fireworks. No I have real trouble with sudden unexpected sounds, so yeah for fireworks and scare cords in movies, but other than that I can’t block out sounds however faint that I don’t want to hear. If a dog barks near me it scares me, if it continues or if the dog is far away it annoys me. Same with kids. My ideal living would be somewhere far more remote than I live now or at least in a house so there are some distance to the neighbors. When I listen to music I do so loudly, if only to drown out other sounds so if i like a sound i don’t have a problem with its volume. Only the sounds i don’t like bother me.

And I think I will end there. I realize that I didn’t talk much about asperger but I really didn’t know what to bring up. I didn’t want to talk about the criteria since it has been awhile since I read them and I don’t know what more I could say about them. The shownotes for this episode can be found at aspiebloggen.se/5. So that will be all for now and until next week take care.

Edit

I should point out that a few days ago i started using twitter again. Well now i don’t read the tweets from anyone unless they tag me. I just don’t have the time or energy to go through it all. Yet i’ve seen comments from people that i missed so to avoid that i will keep an i on my tweets.

Also i no longer read manosphere blogs. I read all of Reaxxion until  i got to the post about it being shutdown but haven’t looked to see if it’s back. Man it has been so long since i recorded the episode that i had to read the show notes to remember what it was about. Hence all the notes for this episode.

 

Hello and welcome to Aspiebloggen podcast episode 4. I am your host Tommy Eriksson. In todays episode I talk about how i feel there never seem to be enough time to get things done and the upsides and downsides to having a twitter account.

This is the podcast where I bring you my views on things, in an attempt to let my voice be heard and to grow my confidence. For too long my voice has not been heard and my views are mostly unknown, but not anymore.

Most of what I will bring up will be about asperger and autism related stuff, but other stuff will most certainly be discussed. My website is at aspiebloggen.se. There you will find the shownotes for each episode as well my other blog posts. The blog itself is in swedish but this podcast and the corresponding shownotes will always be in english.

Now let’s get started.

Todays episode is brought to you by the letter B.

First I would want to apologies for not making a podcast last week. I have been preparing for a new hobby and that has meant a lot of reading. I spent so much time reading various websites about it that last week went by really fast and normally I like to at least have some thought on what I will talk about in an episode before I start writing a script and since I didn’t have time for that I opted to skip a week. But I wont do that again. Not doing an episode just made me question my ability to make podcasts and that’s not good.

Also remember how I talked about getting on iTunes. Well I kinda haven’t gotten around to it. I was going to but then ended up reading the options in Powerpress and realized that I have to write something good for the program subtitle and summary and then panicked slightly and then procrastination set in and I opted to not do it at that time and then time just flew away. I’m good at not getting things done.

But I really need to get on there and other directories, if only to get some stats. I tried getting stats from libsyn but that required a paid account and I thought the same about blubrry but it turns out I just missed the options to activate it. Ooops. Several weeks of possible downloads yet no stats to show for it other than AW stats which I don’t quite understand. Oh well I will just have to admit that this site sucks. Hopefully I will soon have the energy to fix it, but until that happens I will just have to continue pumping out a weekly podcast and possibly a blogpost every now and then. I will not however switch to more than one podcast a week or make it biweekly. That is just too complicated and not something I can manage.
So let’s finally talk about twitter. For the last two weeks which I spent reading up on the new crafts I will learn I took somewhat of a hiatus from twitter. What I noticed was that I could get a lot more done. If reading websites and creating a complicated spreadsheet about what to buy is what can be called getting things done.

Twitter is my main way of keeping track of what goes on in Gamergate so most tweets I get concerns that. But then there are the ones about the mannosphere. I read several blogs and one of them is Danger & play by Mike Cernowich. I also subscribe to his twitter. In fact his tweets and retweets take up most of what I read there. I have recently come to the conclusion that I simply don’t have the time to read his blog from the start. I have started reading it but doing so meant ignoring all newer stuff as well as his podcast. His podcast btw is nice evidence that you don’t need intro and outro music to make a successful podcast. Just voice is enough.
Although most time I have spent have been reading another blog called Return of Kings which I mentioned in another podcast. The founder of it also founded a gaming blog called Reaxxion that I really like. That is the only gaming blog I really keep up with because I simply don’t have the time to read more. There is only so much time I wanna spend reading stuff online.

And time does fly when you are reading blogs that are so frequently updated. I’m currently reading page 4 on Return of Kings and that might be page 5 next time I start reading. I want to read this stuff but time is so short.

I wish I had spent more time last year reading that instead of spending so much time on Cracked or KotakuInAction on reddit. I’m not saying reddit is bad unlike Cracked, only that it updates far too often for my liking, that is why I stopped reading it. I could get most of the same news over twitter instead which meant much less time consumed.

Granted twitter can most certainly be the same. I used to be of the opinion that if you tweeted more than 10 times a day then I would not follow you. Gamergate changed all that. Now I’m happy if some people tweet less than 10 times an hour. I have unfollowed people I liked due to this. Yet I only follow 15 people, one of which is the lander Philae currently shilling on an asteroid and a few others are accounts that haven’t been active for a long time. Yet there are people out there who follow hundreds or thousands of people. How on earth do they do it? They must be constantly glued to their screens and if they aren’t then they must be missing a lot of tweets. If they are then why even bother subscribing to so many people and how do they determine what to read and what to skip? I just don’t get it.

A part of me wants to quit twitter. I get too much content that way. Too many links to articles I wanna read which means that I must skip reading other things. I used to read Brickset.com news and Technicbricks.com. Those blogs are about Lego. I stopped reading them for a while first due to lack of interest, used to hold of for a few weeks at a time, and then because Gamergate made me not have time to read them. Now I haven’t read them since about july and if I did read them I would feel stressed about not reading other stuff.

My days are like let’s read this and then let’s read that and oh look at the time, it is bedtime. The next morning I’m like ok should I read that. No wait I read some of that yesterday to let’s look at this instead since there should be something new. And repeat. Add to that the irritating inability of Polly, the twitter client I currently use to start again after being shut down. There are only so many times I wanna re-authenticate that program after each reboot before I get tired of it. I used to use another program called Turpial, apparently named after some bird from south america, but it stopped working for a while due to twitter switching api and now I think that the interface is just to clunky compared to Polly. That is too bad because I tried running Turpial today for the first time in about a month and it started nicely without needing a re-authentication. Maybe I should try to find some other twitter client with a small footprint. Many programs take up too many resources, that is why I liked these 2, they don’t do that.

While making the script for this episode I came to a conclusion. I will stop reading twitter, at least for a while. I read a blog called the Ralphretort and that will just have to be my main way to get Gamergate related news. The other blogs will have some more and that will have to be enough. Hopefully by doing this and avoiding old posts on the previously mentioned blogs I can catch up and perhaps get back to twitter in a few months. I was going to talk about how twitter was going to be my way of getting more social but I now realize that I don’t have the time nor energy to make that happen so for now I will stay away. I don’t even have time to comment on the blogs I read.

BTW please note that every time I make a post or podcast there will be a tweet sent out. Right now I don’t feel like going through the trouble of deactivating that feature just in case I decide to come back to twitter. But please don’t respond over twitter, I wont see it. Instead, comment on my blog over at aspiebloggen.se. The shownotes/script for this episode will be over at aspiebloggen.se/4.

And that will be all for this week, until next time take care.

Edit made 2015/02/14

I’m so sorry but just noticed that i apparently forgot to link to the media file for this episode. It is fixed now.

 

Hello and welcome to Aspiebloggen podcast episode 3. I am your host Tommy Eriksson. In todays episode, things that should have been in earlier episodes and also time for iTunes.

This is the podcast where i bring you my views on things, in an attempt to let my voice be heard and to grow my confidence. For too long my voice has not been heard and my views are mostly unknown, but not anymore.

Most of what i will bring up will be about asperger and autism related stuff, but other stuff will most certainly be discussed. My website is at aspiebloggen.se. There you will find the show notes for each episode as well my other blog posts. The blog itself is in swedish but this podcast and the corresponding show notes will always be in english.

Now let’s get started.

Todays episode is brought to you by the letter A.

This podcast was supposed to come out yesterday but i heard about how iTunes and more specifically the iTunes player from libsyn doesn’t like variable bitrate. This is what my previous episodes was encoded in following the advice from the podcast The audacity to podcast. So for this podcast i had to change it to use iTunes instead. I didn’t notice much difference but at least it didn’t sound worse, and the test recording i did got smaller than the lame version so i’m sticking to this.

I always wondered after hearing the advice about using the lame mp3 encoder with the quality set to 5, why the other episodes has a bitrate at exactly 64 kb when my own episodes has a changing bitrate that never got that low. Well now i know why. Hopefully those of you using the libsyn player could at least listen to my previous episodes. From now on all mp3 encoding will be done in iTunes and not in lame.

This is the second recording of this episode. I did an earlier that didn’t have a script and realized about the one minute mark while editing that it was total and complete crap and that i would not continue editing a episode that at that time reached 22 minutes of mostly rambling. I did make some notes so i used them to make this script instead. Trust me when i say that regardless what you think about this recording, the other one was way worse. I realize now that i can not make unscripted podcasts and will therefor stop. I refuse to have a quality decline when there should be a rise instead.

Now it is time for a big step for me. After this podcast is published i will submit it to iTunes. I know that it is fully possible to do this after only one episode but i also know that unless you know what you are doing, and i for one are only getting started on that, submitting the first episode to iTunes risks getting the podcast denied due to insufficient quality. I don’t know what the quality requirements are but i have a feeling that my first episode was below it so i wanted to learn more. And considering the changes made during last episode that the change in encoding it sure is good i waited.

Now for things that should have been in earlier episodes but that i forgot to include. The first is an explanation regarding the cover art. My first cover art had a green background similar to my old website. I will also include it in the shownotes at aspiebloggen.se/3. For those just listening this is what it looked like. Near the top left was the text asperger syndrome. This was one of 3 topics i considered covering. Below it was the text Lego, below that was the text Gaming and at the bottom was the url for my blog. At the lower right was a picture of me sorta looking up on those words.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/99192724@N06/16418446311/

This is the old cover art.

The main problem with that design was that i learned about how it was good to zoom out to that the picture was about the size of a postage stamp. And when doing that only the words asperger syndrome was readable, and that is not the name of the podcast. Also the name of the podcast was nowhere to be found so i redesigned it, this time using Inkscape instead of Gimp because i really don’t like Gimp and since apple has a tendency to change their rules regarding cover art it seemed best to make it in vector graphic so that it could be scaled up if needed. BTW for those just learning to use Inkscape, just ignore the menus on the right. You don’t really need them to get started.

So regarding the new one. I made sure that it would have the podcast title for once and that it would be readable even you only see it as a thumbnail. Then i wanted to ad some images to it and remembered that the options for Inkscape allows you to login to openclipart.org, so i went there and was pleased that the clipart there was completely free in every way. Just what i needed.

Anyway the boy on the left symbolizes my childhood when i was often confused about why things where the way they where. To an aspie like myself, you people who don’t have aspergers seem almost telepathic when it comes to right away knowing how to deal with many situations. I’m still confused about many things but fewer now than when i was younger.

The man is me right now. An adult ready to let my voice to heard and willing to make it so. Speaking out is hard since i have not even blogged much last year and talking is not something i’m good as but i need to get better at it which is why i made this podcast. There isn’t really any more to say about it.

As you might remember from my comments about the old cover art i also mentioned Lego and gaming. These was topics that i considered having on this podcast. I later learned that if you want your podcast to be easily found and popular it is best to keep the podcast to a single topic and just make another podcast about other topics you might be interested in. Thinking more about it i realized that i can’t really get into talking about Lego right now. I haven’t kept up with Lego news for several months and not built anything either so while i would love to make a podcast about it and probably will. For now i wont.

As for gaming, well i said in the first episode that i will talk about gamergate and i will when i find the time to do so. For the past 3-4 days i haven’t even kept up with my twitter feed. I have been busy reading about other topics of the craftier sort that i wont go into right now. When i wasn’t doing that i either read return of kings or did stuff away from the computer so it has been busy.

But i don’t game enough or know or care enough about gaming to talk about it. I used to play world of warcraft back in the day but stopped and when i play games now it is much more casually. Also like with other things the passion just isn’t there.

And finally in this long episode a word or two about where i will get inspiration for future podcast episodes. My website which was later taken offline was created on the 18th of september 2006 and received its last update on the 19th of october 2008 so it lasted about 2 years. The blog was created on the 1st of january 2007 which means that it has  been going 8 years now. The website stopped getting updated because it was easier to make blogposts instead of webpages. When the site went offline and the blog moved to wordpress.com the pages disappeared with it. But while moving the blog to its current location at aspiebloggen.se i transferred the webpages to the blog so that they would once again be available. This made me realize just how much i had written that i had forgotten about. Well regardless of whether or not i still agree with it i will use those pages as well as older blogposts as source for future podcast episodes. I mean the blog is about asperger ,mostly, and so is this podcast so that seems like an excellent idea.

Well that will be all for now. Wow the episodes keep growing in length. Until next week, take care.

Hello and welcome to Aspiebloggen podcast. I am your host Tommy Eriksson. In todays episode: Things i learned about starting a podcast.

This is the podcast where i bring you my views on things, in an attempt to let my voice be heard and to grow my confidence. For too long my voice has not been heard and my views are mostly unknown, but not anymore.

Most of what i’ll bring up will be about asperger and autism related stuff, but other stuff will most certainly be discussed. My website is at aspiebloggen.se. There you will find the show notes for each episode as well my other blog posts. The blog itself is in swedish but this podcast and the corresponding show notes will always be in english.

Now let’s get started.

Todays episode is brought to you by the letter L.

Wow one week has past since the first episode and not one day has gone by without me thinking about what i have gotten myself into. Anyways it feels good but still strange to finally be up and running. So much work had to be done but now all i have to do is to maintain it and that will be much easier.

But i’m not that fond of how the first episode turned out and while i didn’t really know how to fix it, here are some things that i learned while making it and later:

Take you time to prepare:

I wanted the episode to air last saturday since it would have been my fathers birthday. Had he been alive he would have been 74. Well i started late and finished editing after midnight hence why it appears to be from sunday but i still consider saturday the 17 to be the official launch day of the podcast. Might as well make it clear now for the sake of anniversaries.

Prepare your talking points:

Last time i did have a scripted beginning that has been slightly altered for this and future episodes but then i went unscripted for the rest. I’m not saying that unscripted is bad but i should have written down something more. This episode is entirely scripted but that might chance or future episodes. Now i know i forgot stuff but can’t for the moment remember what. If i remember after beginning recording i’ll put it in the show-notes. Well one thing came to me so that will be next point.

Swearing:

This podcast will not have swearing in it. The first version i posted claimed it would have that but after listening to episode 138 of TAP i realized that swearing might not be such a good idea and it certainly isn’t necessary for this podcast. I listen to a lot of youtube videos that have swearing in them so i’m not that sensitive to it and therefor didn’t mind including it. But having learned now at least one view on swearing and noticed that so far on 2 episodes i have only cursed twice, and that was all in the first episode, i now feel like keeping swearing out of this podcast wont be difficult and therefor i will strive to do it. It will probably turn out for the best in the long run. Should i see a need for profanity, for instance if some guest will be on the show that has a style of talking that does include a lot of profanity then i will mark that particular episode as explicit in some way. But otherwise this podcast will be clean.

This does mean that this episode has a new section to it. Thankfully, if that is the right word, i don’t think anyone has downloaded any episode so i rerecorded the part about swearing for this episode and will update the show notes that will also include the original shownotes. I also never deleted the work-files for audacity so i didn’t have to recompress the audio. I could just make a new file.

But i did have do that for the first episode. Due to the filesize i don’t keep the work-files, that’s the files called something.aup and the corresponding folder. So for episode one i had to edit the mp3 and then reupload it. That might mean that the quality is lower but hopefully it wont be too obvious.

Don’t underestimate the time needed for editing and don’t overedit:

In my first episode i remember pausing alot when talking. I don’t know how annoying or not this might be so for that episode i edited out alot of pauses. This took forever and made me hate editing. For this episode i will leave them in until i either get feedback about them or learn what others think. Editing is good but don’t edit stuff that might not be that bad.

Speaking english is harder than it seems:

I thought about this again when i saw the documentary Moleman 2, the art of algorithms. I wont go into the movie itself now but one thing i noticed every time i see it is how the  narrator has trouble saying certain words since he is from hungary. One such word is visuals. I did a test recording and that word is easier to say in a sentence but i still struggled with it as well. Lets just say that i wont be giving people comments on their pronunciation since i’m not that good at it either. Lets just say that i will have to continue working on liking my voice.

And that will have to conclude episode 2. Maybe i will be able to keep this a weekly show after all. If so that would be great. You can leave comments as well as find this script in the show notes at aspiebloggen.se/2. That’s aspiebloggen, spelled just as the podcast, /2. And if i think about anything while editing i will include it. See you next week.

Additional notes:

I just noticed that i said that my father would have been 64 but the script correctly states that he would have been 74. Oh well.

Oh and while i though the episode would be longer then it got i now understand that shorter episodes will probably be the norm for this podcast. But i don’t care as long as people like listening and i can make each episode as good as it needs to be.

BTW i will never again try to say the word algorithm. Man that was hard. I know i didn’t get it right but lost interest in trying again.

Original notes regarding swearing. Was removed and then the episode was re-uploaded.

This podcast has swearing in it. Yep i might occasionally swear. I don’t know what the advice on swearing is for podcasts, most likely now to overdo it, but i do know that itunes has a option regarding explicit content. I have seen it in the settings for powerpress. Well i don’t swear a lot during that day but it happens and i don’t want to censor myself for the podcast so it will happen again. So basically what i’m saying is keep you children away from this podcast or just tell them not to talk like me, i don’t know. On to the next point.

This is the show notes for the very first episode of Aspiebloggen podcast. I don’t know what to include with it for now so here are some thoughts i had while editing.

When i say leave a note in the show notes i of course mean comment. Also when i finished the recording the timer really was over 18 minutes. I then edited out several minutes and still didn’t get all the pauses i made. Yep i still have a lot to learn about recording podcasts. Oh well it could have gone worse. I will most certainly stick to shorter podcast, below 10 minutes. Way to much editing needed for longer podcasts.

BTW i’m writing these additional notes while editing the episode. I’m at the 13 minute mark now. Wow 5 minutes deleted and it all was either silence, me clearing my throat or me making a mistake and having to repeat myself. And it’s done. Time to go online.

Regardless of how much you read about podcasting, it’s only when you finally try to publish an episode that you discover just how much work is involved.

Edit:

This episode has been slightly altered to remove profanity and then reuploaded.

Min tanke var och är fortfarande att jag ska köra igång med min podcast i morgon eller möjligen på lördag. Tanken var att jag skulle spendera tisdagen med att ordna till bloggen. Bland annat skulle jag fixa trasiga länkar samt skapa länkar till sidor och undersidor. När jag skapade sidorna så lång bloggen fortfarande på wordpress.com och jag ville inte skapa fler trasiga länkar. Men jag åkte på problem. Varning långt inlägg.

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